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Category: holy @#%@%!!!

June
30th

Amy Winehouse smackdown “all part of the Glastonbury experience,” battered fan tells Brit media

The guy on the receiving end of Amy Winehouse’s fury this past weekend at England’s Glastonbury Festival tells a different story than the account posted at RollingStone.com, saying the singer may have been angry about being groped. The fan says it was a case of mistaken identity brought on by someone else throwing a hat, NME reports. But he ain’t bitter about it.

June
30th

Amy Winehouse may be skinny, but she’s got a wicked right hook

Amy Winehouse did something crazy in public? No way! Well, in her defense it may have actually been an appropriate reaction to the circumstances this time, based on the official story about what led to the reaction below. Click the video, or try looking around here if that footage has been yanked already (like the first clip I posted this morning.)


June
13th

Tonight I’m gonna party like it’s 1984

I was looking ahead to July’s big musical happenings and noticed a disturbing trend going on, with local stops by Billy Idol (July 1, the Paramount Theatre), Cyndi Lauper and the B-52s (July 1, WaMu Theatre), George Michael (July 2, KeyArena) and Boy George (July 20, Showbox at the Market.) What is this world coming to? All those MTV stars from the ’80s, and not a single one booked at the Emerald Queen? And did we all just fall into a wormhole and get sucked back to 1984 or what?


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March
1st

Costumed crazies with shopping carts, the raddest ’80s night ever and other stuff that makes Portland totally awesome


Robert Palmer and his “Addicted to Love Girls” are apparently doing something called the Portland Urban Iditarod.

E. JASMIN


Portland rules! That’s why video game guy Bill Hutchens and I decided to Amtrak our way down here for birthday weekend. And last night, we discovered the trendy Nob Hill neighborhood (think Seattle’s Queen Anne) where we got started at a frou-frou French joint called Meriwether’s (rotisserie chicken in the fireplace, bottles of wine that cost more than your iPod.) Trust me. Go with the roast duck or goat

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Jan.
31st

Alice in Chains on Aqua Net? Say it ain’t so!!!!

I was goofing off for a sec, surfing around Digg.com (you know, like every shock jock in America does for “research”) when I came across the headline “Six musicians with pasts they’ll hope you forget.” Of course I had to read it. And most of it wasn’t news. I already knew about Tori Amos’ butt rock roots in Y Can’t Tori Read and Dr. Dre’s less-than-gangsta appreciation of eyeliner in his pre-NWA days. But while I’d read about Alice in Chains’ glammy, pre-grunge period, I wasn’t quite ready for the picture I found …


… here.


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Jan.
17th

I am the proud owner of Mark Arm’s old futon

Bought it from a friend who bought it at some rock charity auction long before she moved to the Dubai. And as I started to put the sucker together, I was tempted to call Mark and ask him what all these mysterious splotches are all about. Ewwwww! No, really. Touch me, I’m sick. Note to self: Buy new futon cover this weekend.


Jan.
17th

What do Timbaland and Barry Bonds (allegedly) have in common?

Remember last month when I was marveling at how freakishly huge Timbaland has gotten? You know, how you could slap some green paint on that bruh and have him play the title role in the next Incredible Hulk movie? Well, a story in the New York Times suggests that more than just a few extra hours in the gym may have gone into that physique. Can you say ‘roids? 50 Cent, Wyclef Jean and Mary J. Blige are also mentioned.


Wait, Wyclef and Mary J? Huh?



RAAAAARGGGGGGHHH!!! TIMBALAND

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Dec.
11th

What’s that sound? Oh, that’s Ian Curtis spinning in his grave

I was just listening to The Killers’ remake of Joy Division’s “Shadowplay” – you know, giving it one more chance. But it gets more repulsive with successive spin. Coincidentally, I’d been obsessively listening to original version – all icy and apocalyptic – since the reissue of “Unknown Pleasures” came out a few weeks ago. Then along comes the Killers’ video on MTV. And they somehow made the frickin’ song sound perky, like something that belongs in a Gap ad. Perky, fer Chrissakes! And while I don’t otherwise have much of a problem with the Killers (aside from wondering what the

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Oct.
25th

The most awesomest tribute band ideas ever

Pop culture writer Bill Hutchens and I were just having a late lunch down at India Mahal downtown when I was inspired with my second greatest tribute band idea ever.


Concept: “Friday I’m in Love,” “Boys Don’t Cry,” “Lovesong” and other Robert Smith-related new wave hits played on sitar.


Name: The Khir


Bwahahahahaha!!!! I am soooo funny. I slay me.


My best tribute band idea ever, you ask?


Wait for it. Wait for it.


Concept: A Meat Puppet band with a lead singer that dresses and acts like Billy Bob Thornton

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April
3rd

The most disturbing and confusing thing you’ll see all day …

… aside from the Keith Richards thing in the last blog, that is.


Just when I thought I was over ironic remakes, the rocker least likely to apply the word “ironic” correctly in her own songs comes through. And doesn’t that somehow qualify as ironic? I dunno. I’ll have to drop my high school English teacher a line to sort that out. Anyway, thanks, Alanis.



P.S. I’m guessing this is some sort of statement regarding sexist imagery in top 40 music? Or maybe the utter banality of the average pop

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